I’m just thinking…that’s all…just thinking.
“What will I see?”
My twin sister and I have always had great conversations. Yesterday, Denise asked me a poignant question: “What will I see when I get to heaven?” It is a great question, isn’t it? Here’s a woman who has always believed that there is such a place as a heaven and a hell. She has been through a lot in her short 47 years, but this belief of heaven is something that she has had for decades.
Now just because a person may not believe in a heaven or a hell does not mean that they exist. Anyone who has studied logic or critical thinking will tell you that the possibilities of such places are vast in number. So there is an infinite number of possibilities. But she has believed this to be truth because our grandfather and father have taught us to believe this to be true based on the Bible. The Bible gives us a brief description of heaven. And, quite frankly, that has been sufficient for us to believe in heaven; we have not needed anyone’s testimony of being there for 90 minutes or that it is for real. It is real because the Bible tells us so.
So, what is she going to see? I know that everyone talks about having their “mansion” in heaven. Jesus tells us in John 14:1-6 that heaven is where our heavenly Father resides. He has a “house” and within this “house” are many “dwelling places.” Now I know that many people are looking to have a mansion, but the New Testament Greek is pretty clear that the only house for which we need to be concerned is the Father’s house. I told Denise that she will not have to have her own mansion because she would see the “Big house” where our heavenly Father is and that Jesus has prepared her dwelling place there. Her room is almost ready, and when He’s finished with it she will be ready to occupy that room.
In the beginning of time, when man and woman were formed by God, He placed them in a garden–the Garden of Eden. At the end of the Book of Revelation, those who have loved Jesus Christ and have been kept in Him will be going to a place called “Paradise.” Now the Greek word for “paradise” is interesting because that word can also be translated as “garden.” In other words, what was lost in the Garden of Eden is going to be gained when we go to heaven: we will be in God’s garden once again. So I told Denise that she would see the most beautiful garden that she has ever seen. She loves flowers. It is evident from the many pictures that you can see on her Facebook page. The flowers there will be absolutely beautiful.
The Bible also tells us that we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses. What a blessed truth this is in the Book of Hebrews. This cloud includes the patriarchs that we read about in the Bible. She will get to see Abraham, Moses, Aaron, King David, King Solomon, and the disciples. She will get to speak with Paul the apostle, John the Beloved and a host of other men. I told her that she would be able to speak with Sarah, Ruth, Esther, Lydia and even Mary, the mother of Jesus. She will speak with a whole host of other women. She will get to see my grandparents who have gone on before us.
But most importantly, she will get to see Jesus Christ in all of His splendor and glory! She will be in His presence and will worship Him with a whole host of people from every tongue and every tribe on earth who have trusted Him for salvation. She will see Him with the 24 elders that are around His throne. She will see what Ezekiel saw: a throne on what appeared to be a crystal glass or sea. And on top of that crystal glass is a throne with One sitting on that throne who looks like amber fire from the wast up and amber fire from waist down. She will see Jesus Christ, her Lord and Savior, her King of kings and her Lord of lords.
“What will I see when I get to heaven?” Denise, you will see everything that you’ve believe that you will see according to the Scriptures. You’ll see it all because all of it belongs to you as a joint-heir of Jesus Christ.
I love you, Denise, and I will see you later.
A Moment in Time
There are a lot of moments of which I have been thinking. These moments are special to me. Some of these moments I have never shared with anyone else because they are that special to me. But I think that I am in need of sharing some of these moments with my readers. It may not be as important to you as they are to me. I think that it is for my sake that I share these.
The moments of which are of most import to me are the moments that my twin sister and I have shared. Denise is a special person in her own right. She is independent. What she has been able to accomplish in her short years is amazing. Her legacy lives in 25 years of second grade students who have grown into great people serving our Country, our hospitals, our schools, and so many other areas in life. But the moments that we share are deeper than this–at least I think they are.
I like to tell people that we were “womb-mates” for nine months. At the end of our lease, she kicked me out and eight minutes later Denise came. Why eight minutes later? She was fixing her hair, of course! I had no hair but she did. She got all of the brains, looks, hair, beauty, etc., etc. Then I have even said that she’s been late ever since. When asked if we are identical twins my response is always, “No, she’s a girl and I’m a boy! But we do look alike when she grows her beard!” When she is asked the same question, her response is, “No, we’re not identical. However, we do look alike when he puts his hair in pigtails!” That’s just something that we have said ever since we were children. We always thought it was funny to say these things.
Another thing that we have shared occurred when we were just infants. After we were born, my mother tells us that we were inseparable. For the first 2-3 years of our lives we slept in the same crib. If we were separated we would both cry until the other was placed in the crib. After a while we felt secured enough to be separated in our own cribs.
Our first school was a private school called Tiny Tot. We were in the same class together and enjoyed our first grade together. My parents thought it would be good for our second grade year and every year after that to be in separate classes. She blossomed apart from me. I on the other hand was always concerned about what she was doing. I did not have the gumption that she had in school. I only did what I had to do to get by. But she excelled. Every effort of hers was and is a success. She is determined; she has always been determined. Her grades were always better than mine. She really enjoyed school while I struggled through school wondering what she was doing.
My sister, Dina, was a track star where we grew up. In fact, I think she still holds records back home that have never been beaten. At any rate, she was teaching Denise and me how to jump hurdles at the track where she practiced. Denise would actually go over the hurdles. I would just knock them down so Dina put my hurdles lower. She worked hard to help Denise and me. Denise excelled while I just decided that the best course of action for me was to just run around them on one side or the other.
Denise started playing in the sixth grade band. She has played the flute for years. I started with the trumpet. My brother David played the trumpet and I wanted to play like he did. My other brother Dathan played the clarinet like my dad. After the sixth grade, I joined the choir–it was easier on the lips! Denise played the flute in band throughout junior high and high school. But she decided at the end of our junior year in high school that she wanted to play a different instrument. Would you believe that she chose the cymbals? She would be up in the stands with the band during football games just twirling those cymbals and clanging them when it was time. But she never put her flute down completely. She still played her flute and has all of these years.
There was one year that both Denise and I took piano lessons. Again, she excelled in piano. I think we would have stayed with piano if our teacher was not so mean. We have always said that we thought she needed to wear one of those German army helmets with the spike on top! We even thought that the mole on our piano teacher’s upper lip should have been removed! I remember at our one and only recital, there was this kid that thought he was all that and a bag of chips. After the recital, Denise and I went home and made fun of him on Dina’s piano. Yes, we digressed, but we had a lot of fun together! I remember that I made up a song on the piano to make fun of that kid and she and I just laughed and laughed.
When I had moved to Tennessee in 1990, six months after being married to my Cheryl, I received a phone call one day from Denise. She was in the hospital and wanted to tell me that she was alright. She was in the midst of passing a kidney stone. When she told me that I was shocked. I was in the hospital when she called and I was passing a kidney stone! We still marvel at how many stones we both have passed and the ones we were unable to pass. It seemed that I would call her when she was struggling with something or she would call me when I was struggling with something–just out of the clear blue sky. It is as if we had a sixth sense of some kind. I would say it was a “twincidence”!
This evening, as she was sitting in her recliner, she asked me what I was thinking about. I told her that I wish she was not having to deal with this cancer. I wish that it was me instead of her. I would rather take her pain than to see her going through it. She retorted, “It’s not supposed to be you! It’s supposed to be me.” I teared up and she said, “Den, I love you so much.” I told her that she was the best twin that I have ever had. She smiled and said, “I had to fight off all of the other ones that wanted to be your twin.” My heart swelled with pride to look into those beautiful brown eyes. I told her that she was going to beat me in the race to heaven just like she beat me in all of the other races we had. I told her it was because I run funny. She smiled–just smiled at me and said that I ran just fine. She is as beautiful as ever.
There are so many other moments in time. My mind is flooded with memories. My heart aches during this dark time. For now I have a moment in time with her; but that is all I have left in this life–just a moment in time. When she passes from this life to the next, I will have to wait until that moment in time when I will join her.
A moment in time…
D.J. Gorena 
